


That Painting is an Asshole (but Zazzalil kinda needs to thank it)

by diagonaltoast



Series: Jazzalil Hogwarts AU [3]
Category: Firebringer - Team StarKid
Genre: F/F, How Jemilla and Zazzalil got together, Mentions Keeri, Sirius Black in painting form, Who knows Zazzalil's feeling better than Zazzalil does
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-24
Updated: 2020-04-24
Packaged: 2021-03-02 02:15:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,406
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23817523
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/diagonaltoast/pseuds/diagonaltoast
Summary: Zazzalil decides, possibly against her better judgement, to rant about her feelings for Jemilla to a painting. Said painting then gets the word around to Jemilla.Or: How Jemilla and Zazzalil got together
Relationships: Jemilla/Zazzalil (Firebringer)
Series: Jazzalil Hogwarts AU [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1705015
Comments: 12
Kudos: 27





	That Painting is an Asshole (but Zazzalil kinda needs to thank it)

**Author's Note:**

> So I was thinking about writing the one about Keeri catching Jemilla and Zazzalil making out that I mentioned in the last one, but then decided I should probably write about them getting together first. I also didn't edit this one, so sorry if it doesn't make as much sense as the others and has some random mistakes.
> 
> Also, the first thousand and a bit words are literally just Zazzalil rambling about how she figured out she liked Jemilla so... sorry?

She was just walking aimlessly through the castle when it happened. When she stupidly decided that confessing her feelings for Jemilla to a painting was a good idea.

It’s not like it was her fault. She had just been wandering around during her free period, minding her own business and thinking about her crush and how she knew that Jemilla would never feel the same, when the painting had asked her why she was looking so glum. Her sad brain had figured ‘eh, what the hell, I can’t really see there being any repercussions, and dude’s probably bored out of his mind anyway the least I can do is offer him some semblance of entertainment by pouring out my feelings.’ So that is what Zazzalil did.

She hadn’t really meant to say anything more than, “I have a huge crush on one of my best friends, but even though I know she likes girls, I know she’ll never like me, and I don’t know what to do.” But the painting had questioned her further and so Zazzalil ended up spilling the whole story.

“It all started in term three last year, though I guess, realistically, it probably started a little while before that, but I had been doing a fine job just ignoring my feelings to the point that I didn’t even realise that they were there until this particular point during term three last year when they just hit me all at once. Then I just couldn’t stop thinking about it, thinking back on all the signs, and wondering how I could possibly be so oblivious to my own feelings. I mean, even Keeri figured it out, and like, don’t get me wrong, I love her, and she’s definitely a lot smarter that most people give her credit for, but she’s still not the brightest bulb.” Zazzalil felt kind of bad for talking about her best friend in that way, but she was frustrated and finally letting it all out.

She started pacing. “Anyway, I guess you’re probably wondering what this event in term three last year was that finally made me confront my feelings?” She paused and looked back to the painting, who was listening attentively, stalling. The painting just nodded once and gestured for her to go on.

“Right.” Zazzalil sighed, “Jemilla started dating Schwoopsie. That was it. It’s not like it was some big revelation, we have a big group of friends and we all kind of figured that there would be some couples within the group eventually. And y’know we were in fifth year so dating was normal, some people had started dating outsiders, only one of those is still going strong, Emberly and Grant, they’re cute, I guess. But something about Jemilla and Schwoopsie being a thing made me feel weird, in a way that I couldn’t explain.

“I knew that it couldn’t be about Schwoopsie, she had dated some other outsider chick earlier in the year and I felt fine, I would even say I was happy for her. Which just left Jemilla. But even though I knew that the reason I was feeling all weird had something to do with Jemilla, I still couldn’t for the life of me figure out what the feeling was or why I was feeling it.

“Anyway, after the first week of them being together, I started avoiding them, originally it had only meant to be for one day, just to get a bit of respite. But even though it still sucked to know they were together, not actually seeing it had helped a lot, so I kept doing it.

Zazzalil sighed again, this time fondly, stopping her pacing and staring off at nothing down the hallway. “Of course, with Jemilla being who she is, it didn’t take her long to figure out what I was doing and confront me about it.” She paused a moment before absentmindedly adding, “come to think of it, the way my heart has beating so fast and hard during that confrontation, but only after she got really close to me, probably should have tipped me off. It didn’t.” She was starting to figure out why Keeri had seemed so exasperated the whole time this had been going on.

“So anyway, after a week of avoidance Jemilla confronted me, asking what my deal was, to which I gave her some bullshit reason that I don’t even remember. I don’t think she believed whatever reason I gave either, but she didn’t question me further, just kind of asked me to stop avoiding her while looking all sad and hurt which I couldn’t stand, another sign I probably should have picked up on, and so I agreed to stop.

“By the third week of my constantly feeling sad and frustrated and disappointed and angry and hurt and… you get the point, I was falling apart, and I had to tell someone. So, I told Keeri, who basically just stated at me like I was stupid for, like, five whole minutes, a look I was fairly familiar with but not coming from Keeri, before she was all like, ‘I was hoping you’d figure it out on your own, but it’s just ridiculous at this point so I’m just gonna tell you myself. You have feelings for Jemilla, like romantic feelings.’

“And let me tell you, I was ready to _clap back_ , tell her that that was insane, and that she was the one being ridiculous. But her accusation shocked me so much that I paused, and during this pause I actually thought about it, and I realised that she was right. It hit me like a tone of bricks, I literally almost fell over. The next words out of my mouth ended up being ‘oh. _Oh fuck._ I’m _Jealous?!’_ to which Keeri just nodded along happily, glad I had finally caught up.

“My legs are tired.” Zazzalil interrupted herself, starting to realise how long she had been talking and deciding to try and wrap this up while sitting herself down against the opposite wall, facing the painting. “Then, Keeri suggested I tell Jemilla how I feel, to which I’m like, ‘uh, no thanks, you never tell a girl you like her, it makes you look like an idiot.’ Right?!” She looked to the guy in the painting, who she was now realising was Sirius Black, who was nodding his head rapidly in agreement. “Thank you! Keeri disagreed with me on that point. And besides, Jemilla was with Schwoopsie, and she seemed happy, I wasn’t going to get in the way of that.

She kept trying to get me to tell Jemilla for a little while, but after many vehement refusals, she eventually gave up, not completely mind you, she still tries to get me to do it every now and then, but I always refuse.” Zazzalil was quite proud of herself for standing her ground especially since, “it became infinitely harder to convince Keeri that it was a bad idea after Jemilla and Schwoopsie broke up, but I managed. They only ended up dating for five weeks, but they were the worst five weeks of my life. I thought that, maybe over the holidays when I wasn’t seeing her every day, the feelings would go away. Yet here we are.”

She finally looked down at her watch for the time, realising in a panic that her free period was over. “Shit, I’m gonna be so late!” Zazzalil looked back at the painting of Sirius Black while standing up and starting to back away. “Thanks for listening dude, I actually feel better after letting that all out. Bye!” with that, she turned and sprinted off to class.

The rest of the day went pretty normally for Zazzalil, she got chewed out pretty badly by Professor Snape for being so late to potions, losing twenty house points in the process, and so was extra careful to be perfectly on time for everything else. It freaked everyone else out a bit, but after she explained about Snape they all understood, and knew that she would be back to her regular schedule of being ridiculously late, or completely missing, breakfast and then just slightly late for everything else, in no time.

But apart from her sudden punctuality, Zazzalil’s day was just another of her average Friday’s. Or at least it was, until she noticed Jemilla staring at her, in a way that she found strange but not particularly unwelcome, all throughout dinner. It wasn’t like she had never caught Jemilla staring at her before, just that this time, rather than incredulity at something stupid Zazzalil had done (or sometimes in a way that made Zazzalil hopeful that maybe her feelings were returned, but as soon as she looked at Jemilla, the other girl would look away and Zazzalil would be convinced that she had imagined it), this time it was with an expression that Zazzalil couldn’t quite read, but seemed to be very similar to the ones that had made her feel so hopeful in the past.

Only this time, when Zazzalil caught her staring, Jemilla didn’t look away so fast that Zazzalil wasn’t sure that there had been a look in the first place. Rather Jemilla seemed to be very deliberately keeping her eyes on the other girl for a few moments after her stare had been returned, before slowly looking away and continuing a conversation with another of their friends.

And though, as Zazzalil had already established, the looks were far from unwelcome, she did find them strange, and couldn’t for the life of her figure out the reason behind them (after all, she had already pretty much forgotten about her conversation with the painting of Sirius Black earlier that day, what with suddenly being so focused on being punctual). So, when everyone had finished their dinner and were talking about what they might do before they had to head back to their separate common rooms, and Jemilla asked to speak with her, she readily agreed. If Jemilla hadn’t asked, she probably would have, herself.

Jemilla ended up leading Zazzalil to the library, as she had figured that, since it was the beginning of the school year and just after dinner, it would be the best place to have a private conversation. Though she still picked a more secluded area, just in case.

“What’s up?” Zazzalil asked, she had just been getting more curious the further Jemilla took them to find a private space.

“I had a very interesting conversation with a painting just before dinner.” Jemilla was not one to beat around the bush. Though, to Zazzalil, beating around the bush was exactly what this seemed to be as she just got more confused and searched her mind for an answer as to what this would be important.

When it finally dawned on her, she froze. Blood rushed to her face as she floundered for what to say next. Yes, the age-old question, what do you say when your crush confronts you about a conversation you had with a painting earlier that day that was about said crush? Probably not, “that fucking painting fucking snitched!” Which is exactly what Zazzalil eventually ended up saying.

Jemilla’s eyebrows raised. “So, it wasn’t just a silly rumour that a surprisingly animate Sirius Black decided to start just to cause drama?” That had been her first thought, after all, surely it was not possible that, after all these years, Zazzalil actually returned her feelings.

“Uh… Yes?” Zazzalil hoped to be able to latch on to this explanation and quickly flee the room in order to avoid the inevitable future conversation, but with the way it came out (absolutely no confidence behind it and like she was asking a question), and the significant look that Jemilla was giving her, the other girl was obviously, in no way, convinced. “Ok fine. I may or may not have had a conversation with a painting this morning, he’s actually a very good listener. Though I think him just wanting to cause drama probably played a part in that, in all of this really.” She said, referring to the situation at hand.

When Zazzalil looked up at Jemilla, the girl was just staring back at her in surprise and disbelief, and she decided that she needed to get out of this conversation as quickly and painlessly as possible, figuring that Jemilla’s silence was because she didn’t feel the same way and was trying to find a way to let her down easy, and just started rambling. “Look, yes I told the painting that I had a crush on you, and yes that is true, but I understand that you don’t feel the same way and are just trying to let me down easy right now.”

This finally seemed to wake Jemilla up from her surprised state, still finding it hard to believe that Zazzalil returned her feelings, and she tried to interrupt her, “Zazzy.”

Zazzalil continued as if she hadn’t heard her, not wanting to give the other girl the chance to confirm what she was saying, “and that’s really nice of you and all, but you don’t need to, really. I get it, and I already knew you didn’t feel the same way.”

“Zazz!”

“I mean, that’s why I didn’t tell you about it in the first place, why would I when I knew I would just end up getting rejected?”

“Zazzalil!”

“It’s all that stupid painting’s fault! If he’d just kept his damn mouth shut, this could all have been avoided! I thought he was just giving me a space to let all my feelings out, not conspiring against me!”

“ZAZZALIL!”

“I mean, the dude even agreed with me, you never tell a girl you like her, it makes you look like an _idiot-_ mph!”

Jemilla had eventually decided that she wasn’t going to get Zazzalil’s attention by speaking, so she cut her off with a kiss instead. Zazzalil was so shocked that she just froze, this was the last thing she had expected, until her brain finally caught up and she lifted her arms to link them around the taller girl’s neck and kiss her back.

Jemilla pulled away after a few moments and smiled softly at the dazed look on Zazzalil’s face, “you still think you look like an idiot?”

“…What?” Zazzalil blinked slowly, her brain once again trying to catch up.

Jemilla just laughed lightly. “In case it wasn’t obvious enough already, I like you too.”

The shorter girl’s face broke into a beaming grin. “Yeah?”

“Yeah.”

The two girls just stared at each other for a few seconds, fully comprehending what had just happened, before Zazzalil broke into a relieved laughter and Jemilla joined in. After a while Zazzalil leaned up to kiss the other girl again but was stopped by Jemilla reaching out and placing a finger on her lips.

“As much as I would like to continue that, and trust me I would _really like to_ , I think we need to talk first.”

Zazzalil sighed in resignation, “yeah, I guess you’re right. So, first question, what exactly did Black’s painting tell You?”

“Just basically that you had spoken to him this morning and had confessed to him that you had a crush on me, and you realised it last year while I was dating Schwoopsie.” Jemilla stated matter of factually, then decided to tease her a little. “Oh, and that the reason you had been avoiding me then was because you were _jealous_ , but that you didn’t even realise that until a few weeks later when Keeri had to basically spell it out for you.” She said with a smirk.

“Yeah, yeah, laugh it up, I’m bad at recognising my own emotions, does that really surprise anyone? Besides, I bet you weren’t much better.”

Jemilla just scoffed. “Zazz, I’ve known that I’ve had a crush on you since second year.”

And now Zazzalil was just incredulous. “We hated each other in second year!”

“I never hated you Zazzalil.” When Zazzalil’s expression did not change but for the raising of a single eyebrow, Jemilla conceded. “Ok, so maybe I hated you a little bit. But you know what they say, there’s a fine line between love and hate. And as much as you annoyed me, you were also cute, and nice… to certain people, and smart, and did really well in class, though that also really frustrated me since you never seemed to be paying much attention.”

It was Zazzalil’s turn to scoff. “I am not _cute._ ”

“Seriously, _that_ is what you got from everything I just said?” And Jemilla’s turn to be incredulous. Zazzalil opened her mouth to respond, but Jemilla cut her off before she could. “Zazz you are five foot nothing, literally everything you do is cute. You can’t help it.”

The ‘five foot nothing’ girl in question just scowled in response and said. “I think that’s enough talking for now. I am going to kiss you again.”

Jemilla happily obliged, leaning down to meet Zazzalil halfway as the other girls’ arms looped back around her neck, and she placed her own on her waist. The kiss became passionate very quickly, both girls wanting to make up for lost time, and Jemilla turned them slowly before pushing Zazzalil back into the bookshelf that was now behind her, who moaned in response and pulled Jemilla closer.

Just as Jemilla was starting to kiss her way to Zazzalil’s neck, she remembered something and pulled away quickly, causing the shorter girl to whimper at the loss. “One more thing.”

“ _What?_ ” Zazzalil whined, trying to pull Jemilla back in.

Jemilla pulled away completely, so as not to get distracted, and Zazzalil started to pay full attention, realising that this was important. “Do you think that we could just keep this between us for a little while?”

“Why?” Zazzalil asked, confused.

“I- it’s just- “ Jemilla stammered, trying to figure out how best to explain herself. “After Schwoopsie and I broke up last year, the whole Tribe just felt kind of… off, for a little while. I guess I just want to make sure that we are both sure that we’re playing the long game here before we tell the others. That way, if we do break up without really getting anywhere, we can avoid any awkwardness within The Tribe. Except probably between ourselves.”

Zazzalil was slightly disappointed but was trying not to show it. “I thought I had made it pretty clear that this was definitely something that I wanted… and that you did to.”

“I do! I promise Zazz, I have wanted this more than anything for so long now.” Jemilla hurried to reassure her.

“Then why…?”

“I’m just worried that, after we’ve both been wanting this for so long, and have been imagining what it would be like, or at least I have, I’m just assuming that you have too.” Zazzalil nodded in agreement and gestured for her to continue. “Well, it’s just that, you know, sometimes you build something up in your head, and when you finally get the real thing you realise that it’s not all it’s cracked up to be.” Jemilla hated voicing the thoughts, but they were real worries and she wanted to have a safety net.

“I am almost certain that that is not what’s going to happen here, hell one of the reasons I even dated Schwoopsie in the first place is because I had pretty much given up on believing that you could ever feel the same way and I was trying to get over you. I _want_ to be with you, I just also want play it safe for a little while until I’m _completely_ certain.” She spoke imploringly, hoping that Zazzalil would understand.

And as much as it hurt, Zazzalil had to admit that it made sense, that it might be better in the long run. “Ok, I get it, we can keep this to ourselves for as long as you want. Besides, maybe sneaking around will be fun.” She smiled up at Jemilla, who smiled in relief in response.

“Thank you for understanding.” She smirked mischievously while leaning down to capture Zazzalil’s lips again. “Now, where were we?”

Zazzalil smiled into the kiss, then began to get fully lost in Jemilla again. But before she did, she had a single thought, ‘that painting is an asshole, but I also kinda need to thank him.’

**Author's Note:**

> I'll be honest, the main inspiration for this one was that I was reminded of the line "you never tell a girl you like her, it makes you look like an idiot." (I don't remember how or why) And it was immediately something that I could picture Zazzalil saying.


End file.
